Seeking Jordan will be available in hardcover March 15, 2016. You can pre-order it now from or Barnes & Noble.

What Loss Is

There is only one thing that works for remembering what love is. That is to hold each other—without hope or demand, without keeping track of what’s taken or given, without any deliberate blindness to the pain. Just holding to feel all of it—the failure, the sweetness, the fear, the need. Holding all of it—the place from where the dark visions come, the place that gives, the place that runs away.

Holding until it is possible to hold without arms, hands, without touching chests. Holding with mere breath—felt across miles, years. Holding with mere being. Everything.

Matthew McKay
by Matthew McKay

Matthew McKay is a clinical psychologist and a professor at the Wright Institute in Berkeley, California. In 1979, he cofounded Haight Ashbury Psychological Services in San Francisco and served as its clinical director for twenty-five years. Currently he serves as the director of the Berkeley Cognitive Behavior Therapy Clinic. He has explored spiritual and afterlife issues in two previous books: Why? and Your Life on Purpose. He is also the author of professional and self-help psychology books, including Thoughts & Feelings, Messages, Mind and Emotions, Self-Esteem, Prisoners of Belief, and many others.

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